Thursday 19 April 2012

Gonna make this my year...

   I am feeling in an absolutley immense mood right now. No words can describe how 'on top of the world' I am feeling. Not in an over-confident type way, just a proud, positive and motivated type way. Lots of things have happened in the last 2 weeks that have had major changes to my attitude towards so many things! It's amazing how in such a short space of time, your life can turn around! If anyone knows this, it's me, but usually it's because of a bad thing, not a good thing. If you don't already know, I'm 15 and in year 10 at school.. but for the whole of year 9 I was out of school because of a problem which I'll do another post about if anyones interested, but basically in a nutshell I found myself in a terrible situation with a pedophile on the internet.. not sure if I've already mentioned this? But never mind, anyway.. yeah I had to have home tutoring, and only studied core subjects (Science, English & Maths) and this week was my first week back at school as a normal student. I must admit, it does feel a bit weird, but it has opened my eyes SO much on how many things I took for granted about being at school! I know most people find that school drags, it's not always fun etc. But honestly, once you have been away for such a long time, and been so 'out of the loop' and not had much of a social life because of it, when you go back it's like, boy, I have realllllly missed all of this! Even the hustle and bustle of lesson change I missed!
   So I've decided that this year, I'm gonna make it my year! I turn 16 in September, I have exams, holidays, other exciting birthdays like my little sister turning 2! Moving house hopefully! So many amazing things and I just wanna live for the moment and really let my hair down! I think it's well earnt and deserved considering the amount of crap I've had to deal with the last 2 years and it's given me a real buzz of motivation to just try my best in everything I do! I've learnt that you don't always need other people to be happy, learning to be happy in your own company is such a wonderful thing to learn. A hard lesson to learn no doubt, but once you can do it, there's really no reason why you can't achieve anything you want!
   It all sounds rather Cliché doesn't it? I'm usually not the type to say silly stuff like that, so the fact that I'm writing all this down now must mean something, lol! If you are my age, don't you always hear your parents or other adults tell you that the years whilst your at school, college or whatever, will be the best years of your life, and you're only young once? They are SO right! I don't wanna look back on these years when I'm 30 and think, ah I wish I'd done this, or I wish I'd done that! You know? Yes everyone comes across obstacles in life, but no matter what it is, you have to find a way around it, you will always get beyond it. Everyone has inner strength no matter how weak you feel. Believe me!
   Never, ever take loved ones for granted. Friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, they might all come and go and so really it all comes down to your family!
  Sorry if anyone found this really boring, and if you read it all the way through, thankyou! Haha!

Wednesday 11 April 2012

Dealing with a heart that I didn't break...

I have had the worst weekend to date. Nothing sucks more than having a broken heart does it? But the reality of it is, everyone ends up with one at some point right? Even if you don't choose to be in a relationship in your teens, it still ends up happening when you're older at some point I'm sure. Even if it's not because of a relationship either, it could be anything that causes love loss?
I don't want to go into detail about it all because it's just not worth it, but instead I'm gonna turn this negative experience into a positive one and try and get out there what I've learnt from it all... I'm the type of person that when I go into a new relationship I put my whole heart into it, and yes most of the time it's a bad thing I admit, but in the long run if I do ever meet that 'Mr Right' (which I'm definatley not concerned about at my age by the way) will be a good thing.  I am 100% faithful to that person, I'm honest and caring but unfortunatley that still isn't good enough for some.
"If it's meant to be, it will be." - That quote is so important and I think every girl at my age who goes through the kind of thing I am at the moment should think about that! At the end of the day, we're teenagers and yeah 'High School Sweethearts' is all very nice but it doesn't happen a lot nowadays. Since sex became easier to get, love became harder to find. Fact. I also think the internet plays a HUGE part too, people talk too much on the internet, they know what people are up too 24/7 and years ago it never used to be like that at all, and funnily enough the couples that were together then I bet most of them are still together now!
It is devastating when you break up with someone who you had such strong feelings for and the only way of moving on is sticking with your family and friends and just really trying carrying on as normal. I know how hard this is believe me, but it does work. You're still you, all of your amazing qualities are still there! Everyone has to give theirselves a few days to grieve but there's nothing wrong with that! "If you love someone let them go, because if they really loved you too, they'd come back." At our age, relationships shouldn't be the 'be all and end all of life', the world is our oyster and we've got so much to look forward to! Do not let a boy get in the way of that, there's what like 7 billion people in the world! :)
I hope some of you found this helpful or interesting, nothing like a bit of venting!
Thankyou so much for following!
Lisa xo